Wow, so where to even begin?
I'll try not to make this too long, but I think it's important that I convey how freaked out I was about my trip. There have been a lot of unknowns involved with going to serve this time, and I think that is what was making me so nervous.
When I went to Bethel it was my first time away from home for any extended amount of time, but...it's Bethel-they take care of everything and I never really felt safer. Plus they speak English ;)
When I served in Mexico and last time I served in Italy, I was going to meet a friend to live and serve with-a partner. Plus both my roommates spoke at least enough of the language to get around so I never managed to get myself TOO lost. And in both cases we managed to have tons of fun together both in and out of service.
So the difference this time? I'm going very much on my own, I don't really know the language that well, I'm starting out living with a worldly family and serving in a congregation where I don't know anyone, and then once I get back to Bologna all the details are still kind of sketchy on where I am going to live and such.
Those were just a few of my fears. Then I had a two day painting job right before I left where I had about 20 hours with nothing but my own thoughts and worries in an empty house. NOT GOOD. In the middle of day two, with a paintbrush in hand...I just lost it. I sat there and cried my eyes out-all the while apologizing to Jehovah for being such a baby and asking Him if He agreed that I'm crazy for doing all this. Now, I am not a big crier. I mean, I will cry if I'm talking to someone about something really sad or if someone dies, (or if I read Where the Red Fern Grows-that book gets me every time) but I honestly can't remember the last time I cried when I was all by myself. YEARS.
The only reason I am sharing this kind of embarrassing part of my "adventure" is because I think it makes it kind of real. You read all these experiences of people early on in Jehovah's service who set out in unknown lands with basically a backpack full of Truth books and no plans at all, still wet from their baptism, starting congregations all over the place. They were like the Jonny Appleseed for congregations. They accomplished so much and their experiences make you go "Wow! That's awesome! I don't think I could ever do that!" But they never mention how the night before they set out on their assignment they bawled their eyes out. And maybe that's b/c they never did, but after my last few weeks, I'd like to think that at least some of them did. They bawled their eyes out and then went anyways!
Now you have at least an idea of how I was feeling the morning I was set to leave. I thought I was already at my limit, but somehow I was packing up my stuff anyways. What could make me more nervous? How about finding out hours before I am set to leave the country on a Wednesday afternoon, that the people who were supposed to pick me up aren't expecting me until MONDAY MORNING?!?! I think I had a stroke. My mom started calling people who know brothers in Italy, I was trying to call the Bethel service department WHILE still trying to pack and get ready to leave (I really just wanted to get back in bed and never leave my room again). CRAZINESS. By the time I got to the Atlanta airport, I was a mess. I still don't really know what I have in my suitcase because I have yet to unpack, but I did discover today that I didn't bring any pants. Awesome :/ I got myself the biggest iced coffee Starbucks could sell me, and cried my way through security. I think what had me the most scared was doubting whether I had Jehovah's blessing on my trip. I had really thought I had it at the beginning because of how it all came about, but when things weren't coming together and then definitely when they started falling apart-I just started questioning everything-did I just jump into this???
I took off from Atlanta to Chicago for a layover, and by the time I landed there I had a place to stay and a plan waiting for me when I turned my phone back on. And guess what? It was WAY better than the plan I made for myself! Imagine that! Instead of flying into Rome and immediately going to meet the worldly family I'll be working for (who only speak Italian) I was going to take the train and be picked up by a witness couple from the congregation I am going to be serving in. Honestly, it couldn't have gone better. I got to witness to the lady next to me on the plane for like an hour, which was great. Finding the train was no problem. I even helped some American tourists find their way around! Then Tabitha and Oscar picked me up from the train station and we went to the meeting that night! I got to meet a bunch of the friends, and I'll get to meet them all again Sunday when I am awake :) Today we went in service with a pioneer sister in our hall. It has just been so nice getting to know everyone. I really feel like I have known them forever even though it's only been a couple days. There is such a huge need here as well!! I almost feel guilty that I am only staying here six weeks before I head off to Bologna!
One of the paragraphs from the Bible Study this week in the Acts book said this:
"One of the great blessings of having the truth is that no matter where we go, we can find like-minded believers who will welcome us. Those who love God and who practice true worship have friends all over the world."
I couldn't agree more!
Needless to say, I feel so much better about EVERYTHING! I think this experience is really going to teach me to rely on Jehovah more than I ever have because I will NEED Him more than I ever have. I am so excited and I can't wait until I have some great service experiences to share! I'll try to post some pictures too!
Much love to everyone back home!!
Kimmie
